Coaching

People grow as they take responsibility

I grow when I take responsibility. I grow when I take responsibility to define, commit to, and achieve my goals. Defining my goals helps me understand how I can more effectively pursue God’s calling. Committing to my goals helps me know what to focus on and what not to focus on. And working to achieve my goals results in things like a growing spiritual life and better life balance.

How about you? How does taking responsibility affect your growth? And how does taking responsibility to define, commit to, and achieve goals affect the growth of the leaders you’re developing?

Want to help others grow by empowering them to take responsibility? If so, do these 4 things: (1) To empower others, listen to them. Help them take responsibility by listening to them, instead of talking. Listen a minimum of 80% of the time. Listen in order to help them talk through what their goals are. And when you listen, be sure you look interested and sound interested.

(2) To empower others, inquire about their goals. Help them take responsibility by asking questions, instead of suggesting goals. Ask questions like: What are your goals? How can you pursue God’s calling even more? Where are you and where do you want to go? What can you do to move forward on your goals? What will you do?

(3) To empower others, focus them on their goals. Help them take responsibility by encouraging them to identify their goals. You can do this by inviting them to take 5-10 minutes to list their goals for areas like spiritual life, relationships, leadership, work, and life balance. After they have identified their goals, invite them to select a goal and identify the action steps they can take to achieve that goal. Encourage them to make their action steps SMART—specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timebound.

(4) To empower others, encourage them to achieve their goals. Help them take responsibility by encouraging them to talk about progress on their goals. It’s easy to do—when you see a leader, say, “Tell me about the progress you’ve made on your goals.” And when they achieve their goals, encourage them to celebrate!

Remember, people grow as they take responsibility.

Reflect on responsibility:

  1. What is one way you encourage leaders to take responsibility?
  2. What is satisfying/unsatisfying about getting leaders to take responsibility?
  3. How does taking responsibility affect the growth of leaders?
  4. What can you do to help leaders increasingly take responsibility?
  5. What will you do to help leaders increasingly take responsibility?

Growing is more about motivation than information

In my experience, people grow as they take action to achieve their goals. And in my experience, taking action is more about being motivated than about having information. When I’m motivated, I take action and grow. When I’m not motivated (even if I have good information), I don’t take action and don’t grow.

For example, I wanted to get in shape. I had information about a variety of exercise programs, including weight lifting, biking, walking, and jogging. I had information that weight lifting would be good for my upper body and that biking would be easy on my knees. But I wasn’t motivated to lift weights or bike. I was motivated to walk and jog. And now I’m walking and jogging. I am getting in shape—even though according to the information, walking/jogging might not be the optimal exercise program for me.

How about you? What happens when you’re motivated and unmotivated? And what happens when the leaders you’re developing are motivated and unmotivated? My guess is that both you and the leaders you’re developing grow more when motivated.

Want to grow by targeting what motivates you? Get a coach. Your coach will focus you on what motivates you and encourage you to take action on what you’re motivated to do.

Want to help others grow by targeting what motivates them? If so, here are 4 things you can do: (1) Listen to others. Really listen. When people feel listened to, they share. And as they share, they clarify their motivations. (2) Ask questions to provoke reflection. When people reflect, they identify what motivates them. Ask questions like “What 3 dreams do you want to make real?” (3) Focus others on what motivates them and on turning their motivations into actionable goals. (4) Encourage others to talk about their interests and dreams. As they talk, say things like, “Tell me more.”

Remember, growing is more about motivation than information.

Reflect on motivation:
  1. What was one time when you were motivated/unmotivated?
  2. What is satisfying/unsatisfying about focusing on what motivates a leader you want to help grow?
  3. How does motivation affect a leader’s development?
  4. What helps you target motivation? What hinders you?
  5. What will you do to target motivation?

Believe in others to empower them to grow

You and I both want to grow. We want to grow so we can pursue God’s calling even more. So, we target growth areas like leadership, spiritual disciplines, conflict management, life balance, and Japanese language proficiency.

You and I both know that people who believe in us empower us to grow. I’ve experienced it in my own life. You have, too. When people believe in me, I can do more. I remember talking with my regional director about a workshop. He invited me to lead workshop sessions about focusing on the mission’s purpose and on asking open-ended questions. I felt hesitant. So, I asked some questions. He responded, “Do what you want. I trust you. You’ll know what to do.” I was energized to develop and deliver quality workshops.

I’ve also experienced that believing in others empowers them to grow. For example, I was working with a missionary who was serving in a new ministry, one that really stretched him. I was listening as he reflected on the past 9 months. And then he said, “One of the biggest things you did for me was believe in me. You thought I could do it. That gave me confidence to accomplish new things.”

As a result of these and other experiences, I’ve become increasingly convinced that believing in others helps them grow. I now work to interact with others in ways that show I believe in them. For example, I target helping others become better problem solvers (instead of targeting solving their problems). I also strive to listen (instead of talking), ask questions (instead of advising), focus on drawing out (instead of on putting in), and encourage (instead of critiquing)—remember, Barnabas encouraged Paul.

Empower God’s people to pursue their calling. Believe in someone. Today.
 
Reflect on believing in others:
  1. Who is someone who believed in you? What was the impact of being believed in?
  2. Who is someone who didn’t believe in you? How did he/she communicate this?
  3. What excites/concerns you about believing in others?
  4. How does believing in others empower them to pursue God’s calling?
  5. How could you show that you believe in others?
  6. How will you show that you believe in others?

Ask questions

Do you want to...
  • Be a more effective leader?
  • Help others focus, work smart, and/or pursue excellence?
  • Help students connect God's world and Word?
If you answered yes to 1 or more of the above questions, keep reading. I have a simple, user-friendly, time-tested tool you can use. When you use this tool, people engage, think, and find ways to take action. What's the tool? It's a question.

Does asking questions work? I think so. Asking questions has helped me lead change, empower others to clarify ministry goals and to get organized, and get students to apply a Biblical perspective.

Would you like to learn more about asking questions? If so, try these resources:

Coaching/Leading
Christian Education

More talking = more improvement

It’s July 2000. I’m in London, taking a leadership course from the Principals’ Training Center. And the instructor gets us into small groups, tells us to set up the game, and explains that the goal of the game is to get our game piece across the board by achieving organizational improvement.

Then she tells us to start. The atmosphere is electrically competitive. My group implements policies and moves our piece! We implement procedures and systems and move our piece! We are moving across the board and feeling good! Until we see how far across the neighboring teams are. Many are already 50-75% across the board, while we are a measly 30% at best.

So we focus even more on implementing policies, procedures, and systems, believing that this will propel us across the board toward successful organizational improvement. We move our piece 2 more spaces, and a team announces, “Done!”

I’m stunned: “Done? How could they be done? We did what you need to do to achieve organizational improvement—we implemented policies, procedures, and systems. Why didn’t it work? What did they do?”

During the debriefing, I learn what the winning group did. They didn’t start by implementing policies. They didn’t start by implementing procedures or systems. They started by talking—and they continued talking in order to move their piece across the board toward organizational improvement. I just don’t get it. In my heart, I suspect that the makers of the game, and perhaps the instructor, are mistaken….

But in the ensuing years, I found out how mistaken I was and how right they were. In my organization I saw improvement initiatives founded on policies and systems flounder; I saw improvement initiatives founded on talking flourish.

It’s now July 2011. I’ve (finally) learned my lesson: more talking = more improvement. When all staff members—not just the leadership—talk together about organizational improvement, the organization improves. When all staff don’t talk about organizational improvement, the organization doesn’t improve as much.

(I’m not saying that there is no place for policies, procedures, and systems when working to achieve organizational improvement. What I’m saying is that these should not be the primary strategy—talking should be. Without talking—without dynamic conversation—policies, procedures, and systems lead to temporary improvement, not the lasting improvement your organization needs to carry out its God-given mission. And remember, God uses talking—He talked creation into being and talked with His disciples, who then talked with others about the Gospel.)

You might be thinking, “How do I get people talking? Talking sounds good, but I’m not sure how it would work in my organization. Getting people talking about organizational improvement sounds difficult, and I’ve already got enough going. Just how do I get people talking?”

Good question. I know a way to get people talking. It’s easy. It’s effective and time-tested. And those you’re trying to get talking will like it. What it is? It’s asking questions.

If you want to get people talking, ask questions. Ask open-ended questions like:
  1. Regarding this improvement initiative, what progress are you seeing?
  2. What excites you about this improvement initiative? What concerns you?
  3. What helps us improve? What hinders us?
  4. What can we do to move this improvement initiative forward?
If you want to get people talking, get them to ask each other open-ended questions. At a meeting, pass out the following set of questions for staff to ask each other. Give them 15-30 minutes:
  1. What improvement initiative do you want to talk about?
  2. What progress have you experienced? What’s been satisfying?
  3. What roadblocks have you experienced? What’s been frustrating?
  4. To leverage your progress and minimize your roadblocks, what do you need to keep doing? start doing? stop doing?
  5. What do you think you’ll do?
Bottom line: If you want increased organizational improvement, ask questions to get people talking about organizational improvement.

Here are related resources:

How can you empower others even more effectively?

Through Christian coaching, you can empower others to pursue God’s call. To get an idea of how you can empower others even more effectively, complete the following self-assessment that addresses coaching beliefs, skills, and process (download). Write the number in the blank that comes closest to representing how true a given statement is for you right now. Use the following scale:

4:
Consistently • 3: Usually • 2: Sometimes • 1: Rarely

The coach’s heart
___  I trust that the Holy Spirit is working in the heart of every believer.
___  I believe others can define and achieve their goals.
___  I target motivation, not information.
___  I empower others to take responsibility.
 
LIFE skills: ListenInquireFocusEncourage
___  I’m interested in what others say.
___  When listening, I look interested.
___  When listening, I sound interested.
___  I target understanding, not judging.
___  I don’t talk more than 20% of the time.

___  I ask open-ended questions.
___  I make inviting statements.
___  I don’t ask “why” questions.
___  I don’t give advice.

___  I focus others on developing their own SMART action steps.
___  I don’t suggest action steps.

___  I encourage others through clarification.
___  I encourage others through affirmation.
___  I encourage others through restatement.
___  I encourage others through “encouragers.”
___  I don’t criticize.
 
GROW process: GoalRealityOptions • Will do
___  I’m clear on what the other person wants to accomplish for the session.
___  I don’t suggest goals for the session.

___  I empower others to explore the current reality regarding their goals.
___  I don’t describe others’ reality.

___  I empower others to brainstorm options for taking action on their goals.
___  I don’t suggest options.

___  I empower others to develop 2-3 SMART action steps per goal.
___  I don’t advise others on what actions to take.

How often do you refrain from advising others on what actions to take?

Your client wants to better organize the files in his computer. So you ask him questions like: How are your computer files organized now? What do you like/dislike about the way your computer files are organized? What does being “better organized” look like? In terms of being organized, what do you want to keep doing, start doing, and stop doing?
 
Your client responds to your questions and does some effective reflection. He brainstorms some possible action plans and decides to talk with Martin about how to better organize computer files. You ask, “What else will you do?” You wait for about 10 seconds—your client doesn’t come with another action step. Then you say, “You should organize your files in terms of your job roles….”
 
Not good. Why? Because by suggesting action steps, you could be interrupting your client’s thinking. Because by suggesting action steps, you are doing your client’s work for him. Because by suggesting action steps, you are acting like a consultant, not a coach.
 
My point: Make sure you consistently refrain from advising others on what actions to take.
 
Question: How often do you refrain from advising others on what actions to take?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from advising others on what actions to take?

How often do you use affirmation to encourage others?

Your client is sharing the results of the 2 action steps she’s taken to get better life balance. She walked for 30 minutes each day and is feeling more relaxed. And when her supervisor asked her to design a newsletter, she responded with, “I’m happy to design a newsletter. What would you like me to stop working on in order do this?” Her supervisor said she should stop work on a promotional video!
 
You look at your client and say, “You’ve made real progress on getting better life balance. You accomplished your 2 action steps. You’re more relaxed, and you took on a new task without increasing your overall workload. Good for you!” Your client has a big smile on her face. She looks encouraged.
 
My point: Use affirmation to encourage others.
 
Question: How often do you use affirmation to encourage others?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Make sure you consistently use affirmation to encourage others. And when you give affirmation, make sure your affirmation is:
  1. Growth-centered
  2. Relevant
  3. Authentic
  4. Client-focused
  5. Energizing
  6. Specific
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently use affirmation to encourage others?

How can you help others to work smarter?

By asking questions like:
  1. What’s your ministry?
  2. How do you feel about your ministry and your workload?
  3. How interested are you in getting more done in the same amount of time?
  4. What helps you work efficiently and effectively? What doesn’t help you?
  5. What can you do to work smarter?
  6. What will you do

How can you help others pursue excellence? 

By asking questions like:
  1. What’s excellence?
  2. What’s satisfying/unsatisfying about pursuing organizational excellence?
  3. For your ministry, what does organizational excellence look like?
  4. What can you do to pursue organizational excellence?
  5. What will you do?

How often do you use “encouragers” to encourage others?

In Japan, the listener shows that he’s listening by saying things like “hai hai,” (um hm) and “naruhodo” (I see). When the person talking hears these phrases, he’s encouraged to continue talking. In a real sense, these phrases are “encouragers.”
 
My point: Use “encouragers” to encourage your clients to keep talking and reflecting. When you’re coaching, say things like “yup,” “yes,” “um hmm,” “I see,” and “hmm.”
 
Question: How often do you use “encouragers” to encourage others?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Question: What will do to ensure that you consistently use “encouragers” to encourage others?

How often do you refrain from asking “why” questions?

Ever been asked, “Why did you do that?” I have. While it does get me thinking, it also gets me feeling accused. And sometimes the feeling of being accused gets in the way of me thinking about why I did something.
 
The question “Why did you do that?” taps into childhood memories of really stupid things I’ve done (like when I was a young boy, I thought I could jump across a large manure pit, and fell in instead) and of my parents looking at me, wondering what I was thinking.
 
My point: If you want to help your coaching clients to reflect, and if you don’t want your clients feeling accused, refrain from asking “why” questions.
 
Question: How do often you refrain from asking “why” questions?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Make sure you consistently refrain from asking “why” questions. One thing that helps me do this is asking questions that start with “what.” For example, “What caused you to do that?” (instead of “Why did you do that?”).
 
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from asking “why” questions?

How can you focus others?

By asking questions like:
  1. What’s your mission statement?
  2. What excites/concerns you about the mission?
  3. How does your work help achieve the mission?
  4. What helps you achieve the mission? What gets in your way?
  5. On a scale of 1-5 (5 being high), how focused are you on your mission statement?
  6. What can you do to increase your focus?
  7. What will you do?

How often do you target understanding?

A key reason I get coaching is because I want to understand and be understood. I want to understand, for example, what’s happening with a transition to living in a different culture for 6 months, how I feel about it, and how I can use it to further my goals. And I want to be understood—I want my coach to understand what I’m thinking and feeling, for example, about living in a different culture.
 
I don’t get coaching because I want to be judged. I don’t get coaching so I can hear my coach say things like “Living in a different culture is a bad idea” or “You shouldn’t feel apprehensive about living in a different culture” or “That’s a stupid action step.”
 
My point: If you want to help your coaching clients, listen to them. And when you listen, target understanding (not judging).
 
Question: How often do you target understanding?
  1. Consistently?
  2. Usually?
  3. Sometimes?
  4. Rarely?
Make sure you consistently target understanding. Things that help me do this include:
  1. Remembering as a client how helpful it is when my coach really wants to understand me.
  2. Remembering how much I dislike getting judged and how getting judging decreases my ability to reflect.
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently target understanding?

How often do you refrain from criticizing your client?

I’ve gotten coaching on things that had obvious solutions. For example, I’ve gotten coaching on how avoid getting overloaded at a conference, when the (obvious) solution was to schedule down time. I’ve gotten coaching on which new goals to pursue, when the (obvious) solution was not to pursue any—my schedule was already full.
 
I’m glad that my coaches empowered me to discover effective action steps. I’m glad they didn’t say things like, “It’s a conference—you shouldn’t be focused on avoiding overload” or “Look, your schedule is already full, so thinking about which new goals to pursue is a bad idea.” I’m glad that coaches refrained from criticizing me.
 
Question: How often do you refrain from criticizing your client?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Make sure you consistently refrain from criticizing your client. Things that help me do this include the following:
  1. Remembering how criticism shuts down my thinking—and the thinking of my clients.
  2. Focusing on helping my client discover action steps that will help him reach his goals.
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from criticizing your client?

How often do you make inviting statements?

My client wants to prioritize her tasks. So, I start by asking questions like “What tasks need to get done?” and “What else?” My client mentions a variety of tasks, including updating materials for a workshop on personal productivity, finalizing a presentation on planning tools for the leadership team, and attending a network meeting of church planters. Then she pauses and says, “I really need to get after my workshop materials.”
 
I notice her emphasis on workshop materials. Instead of asking a question, I make an inviting statement: “You mentioned that you need to update workshop materials and then you came back to that again. Tell me more about that.” She shares that she’s concerned about the workshop materials and that she’s been wondering if she should expand the number of workshops she’s doing.

My point: Make inviting statements.
 
Question: How often do you make inviting statements?
 
Things that help me make inviting statements include the following:
  1. Recognizing that inviting statements help me reflect.
  2. Remembering that inviting statements are an effective alternative to questions.
Question: What will you do to ensure that you make inviting statements?

Leaders, empower others by asking questions

Do you want to empower others? Do you want to empower others to focus, solve problems, and achieve their goals? If so, provoke them. Provoke them to reflect. 
 
Reflection is powerful. Personally speaking, reflection helps me clarify my ministry goals, increase awareness of my progress, identify things that are hindering my progress, and develop action steps. In short, reflection helps me do ministry. 
 
I’ve seen reflection help fellow staff members at Christian Academy in Japan (CAJ). After reflecting, staff members were more focused on their goals, managed their time better, and led meetings more effectively.
 
But don’t take my word for it. I asked CAJ staff members to tell me how reflection empowers them. Here’s what they said: “Reflection helps me get clear on what’s going on so I can make effective decisions.” “Reflection helps me organize my tasks and next actions.” “Reflection helps me handle situations more effectively.”
 
So, how can you provoke reflection? By asking open-ended questions:
  • If your co-worker wants to more effectively disciple others, ask: How do you disciple people now? What’s causing you to want to improve? What’s “more effective discipleship” look like? What can you do?
  • If your team is planning an event, ask: What do we want to see happen? What will help this go well? Who’s going to do what?
  • If a pastor is dealing with conflict, ask: What happened? How do you feel? How does the other person see the situation? How can you demonstrate Christ’s love?
  • If a small group leader wants to help her members to be more engaged, ask: If your members got more engaged, what might happen? What helps your members get engaged? When are your participants not engaged? What can you do?
Bottom line: Empower other by asking questions.

*Want to empower others to ask questions? Then ask them questions like:
  1. What problems are those around you facing?
  2. What goals are they trying to achieve?
  3. What excites/concerns you about empowering others by asking questions?
  4. To what extent do you ask questions to help others focus? Prioritize? Solve problems?
  5. How could you more effectively use questions to empower others?
  6. What will you do?

How often are you interested in what others say?

Your mind is starting to wander. Your responses lack your usual focus and enthusiasm. When your calendar alarm goes off, you focus on it and miss a key thought your client has shared. And you’re concerned because you know these things indicate that you’re not really interested in what your client is saying.
 
Question: How often are you interested in what others say?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Make sure you’re consistently interested in what others say. Things that help me do this include the following:
  1. Focusing on my client as a fellow Christian who is working to pursue his calling.
  2. Making appropriate eye contact.
  3. Removing distractions before I start coaching. For example, if I’m using videoconferencing to coach, I turn off all other software applications.
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently are interested in what others say?

How often do you refrain from suggesting options?

Your client has explored what’s happening with her goal to make a career transition. You ask, “What can you do to move forward?” You wait about 15 seconds—your client doesn’t say anything. You rephrase the question and ask, “What are your options?’’ And you wait for about 10 seconds—your client doesn’t say anything. Then you say, “Here are 3 things you could do.…”
 
Not good. Why? Because by suggesting options you did the work your client is supposed to do. Because your suggestions interrupted some really good ideas your client was having—she wasn’t sitting there doing nothing. Because you hear your client say, “I appreciate your willingness to help. I was coming up with some good ideas, and when you gave your suggestions, I focused on listening to you. Now I’m having trouble remembering what I was thinking.” Ouch.
 
Question: How often to you refrain from suggesting options?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Make sure you consistently refrain from suggesting options. Things that help me do this include the following:
  1. Remembering that silence indicates reflection, not the absence of reflection.
  2. Remembering that brainstorming options helps my client get motivated for action. And I want my client motivated for action.
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from suggesting options?

Provoke reflection throughout your mission

I’m watching missionaries, who are sitting in pairs, deeply engaged in conversation. These missionaries are asking each other key questions: What people/projects are you investing your energy in? What’s been satisfying/frustrating? What are the reasons for your feelings of satisfaction/frustration? How can I pray for you?
 
I’m thinking, “This is going pretty well. They’re more engaged than if I did the traditional style of devotions. They’re provoking each other to reflect. And they look like they’re having a good time. Having them use a set of questions worked.”
 
Want to provoke reflection throughout your mission? Have people in your mission use a set of questions to talk together.
 
For example, when you are starting a mission gathering and need an icebreaker, have participants ask each other a set of questions:  When you were in 5th grade, where did you live? What did you enjoy doing? What’s easy/challenging about living in this country? In your recent personal life, what’s been encouraging/discouraging? Overall, how are you feeling? How can I pray for you?
 
When you’re leading a team meeting and want team members to reflect on ministry goals, have team members ask each other a set of questions: What are your ministry goals? What progress on your goals have you experienced? What roadblocks have you experienced? How can you leverage your progress and minimize your roadblocks? You talked about _____ today—what do you think you’ll do?
 
When you’re leading a workshop on getting more organized, have participants ask each other a set of questions: What tools do you use to get organized? How do you feel when you’re organized/disorganized? For you, what does being organized look like? To get organized, what do you need to keep doing, start doing, and stop doing? What will you do?
 
Use the following set of questions to reflect on this article:
  1. What is 1 thing from this article that interested you?
  2. What excites/concerns you about provoking reflection throughout your mission?
  3. How could using a set of questions help you provoke reflection?
  4. When could you use a set of questions to provoke reflection?
  5. What will you do?

How often do you refrain from describing your client’s reality?

Your client is talking about what’s happening with his goal to plan more effectively. You easily relate to this—a few years back you had a similar goal. Since then, you’ve done research on planning, coached 27 clients who are working on planning, and developed a 5-phase planning framework.
 
As you listen to your client, you think, “He’s at phase 2.” Your client pauses, and you hear yourself say, “As best I can tell, you’re in phase 2—you’re working and you have a plan. Since you don’t yet have a good documented plan, you follow your gut more than your plan.”
 
Then you recognize that you just described your client’s reality—something you don’t want to do. Because you want your client thinking, and when you describe your client’s reality, he’s not thinking.
 
Question: How often do you refrain from describing your client’s reality?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Make sure you consistently refrain from describing your client’s reality. Two things that help me do this are:
  1. Remembering that my client is the expert in his life—not me. He knows his reality.
  2. Remembering that my goal is to get my client thinking about his reality.
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from describing your client’s reality?

Want to empower others to reduce their frustrations?

Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:
  1. What are 5 frustrations you have?
  2. How do you feel when these frustrations are present/not present?
  3. How would you feel if you could reduce 1 or more of these 5 frustrations?
  4. How would reducing 1 or more frustrations impact your ministry?
  5. If you reduced all 5 frustrations, what might happen?
  6. What helps you reduce your frustrations? What hinders you?
  7. What’s 1 frustration you want to reduce?
  8. What can you do to reduce that frustration?
  9. What will you do?

How often do you refrain from suggesting goals for the coaching session?

You ask your client, “What would you like to accomplish as a result of talking today?” Your client responds, “I didn’t really think about what I wanted to accomplish today. Nothing’s coming to mind. Got any ideas?”
 
This has happened with this client before. You quickly process through previous coaching sessions and think of 3 possible goals for the session. And you say, “How about how to handle email more effectively, how to make more time to talk with the kids, or how to more effectively target personal strengths?”
 
After asking the question, you realize that you’re suggesting goals for the coaching session. This is something you don’t want to do. Why? Because your client grows as she takes responsibility for identifying goals for a coaching session.
 
Question: How often do you refrain from suggesting goals for the coaching session?
  • Consistently?
  • Usually?
  • Sometimes?
  • Rarely?
Make sure you consistently refrain from suggesting goals for the coaching sessions. Things that help me do this include the following:
  1. Sharing with new and current clients that they are responsible for setting goals for coaching sessions and that setting goals helps them grow.
  2. Recognizing that if a client doesn’t have a goal for a session, now is a good time to have the client develop a list of goals.
Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from suggesting goals for the coaching session?

How can peer coaching help your students apply a Biblical perspective?

You just finished your peer coaching session. During your peer coaching session, your peer coach helped you to focus and work smart by asking questions, questions that provoked you to think. You really appreciate that your coach asks you questions, instead of giving advice—because getting asked questions really gets you thinking and helps you take responsibility to achieve your goals.

You think that using peer coaching with your students might help. And you’re thinking, “How could peer coaching help my students apply a Biblical perspective?”

To find out, explore the following list of 5 questions:
  1. How can peer coaching help your students use relevant Biblical principles?
  2. How can peer coaching help your students use relevant Bible verses?
  3. How can peer coaching help your students include Biblical perspective in their thesis statements?
  4. How can peer coaching help your students apply a Biblical perspective throughout their essays?
  5. How can peer coaching help your students apply a Biblical perspective to issues?
Remember: The real question isn't "How could peer coaching help your students apply a Biblical perspective?" The real question is "How will you use peer coaching to help your students apply a Biblical perspective?"

Help your students apply a Biblical perspective. Use peer coaching. Today.


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