Empower Others

Provoke reflection throughout your mission

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-08-05T20:27:09+09:00

I’m watching missionaries, who are sitting in pairs, deeply engaged in conversation. These missionaries are asking each other key questions: What people/projects are you investing your energy in? What’s been satisfying/frustrating? What are the reasons for your feelings of satisfaction/frustration? How can I pray for you?

I’m thinking, “This is going pretty well. They’re more engaged than if I did the traditional style of devotions. They’re provoking each other to reflect. And they look like they’re having a good time. Having them use a set of questions worked.”

Want to provoke reflection throughout your mission? Have people in your mission use a set of questions to talk together.

For example, when you are starting a mission gathering and need an icebreaker, have participants ask each other a set of questions: When you were in 5th grade, where did you live? What did you enjoy doing? What’s easy/challenging about living in this country? In your recent personal life, what’s been encouraging/discouraging? Overall, how are you feeling? How can I pray for you?

When you’re leading a team meeting and want team members to reflect on ministry goals, have team members ask each other a set of questions: What are your ministry goals? What progress on your goals have you experienced? What roadblocks have you experienced? How can you leverage your progress and minimize your roadblocks? You talked about _____ today—what do you think you’ll do?

When you’re leading a workshop on getting more organized, have participants ask each other a set of questions: What tools do you use to get organized? How do you feel when you’re organized/disorganized? For you, what does being organized look like? To get organized, what do you need to keep doing, start doing, and stop doing? What will you do?

Use the following set of questions to reflect on this article:

What is 1 thing from this article that interested you?
What excites/concerns you about provoking reflection throughout your mission?
How could using a set of questions help you provoke reflection?
When could you use a set of questions to provoke reflection?
What will you do?

How often do you refrain from advising others on what actions to take?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2011-05-11T20:35:00+09:00

Your client wants to better organize the files in his computer. So you ask him questions like: How are your computer files organized now? What do you like/dislike about the way your computer files are organized? What does being “better organized” look like? In terms of being organized, what do you want to keep doing, start doing, and stop doing?

Your client responds to your questions and does some effective reflection. He brainstorms some possible action plans and decides to talk with Martin about how to better organize computer files. You ask, “What else will you do?” You wait for about 10 seconds—your client doesn’t come with another action step. Then you say, “You should organize your files in terms of your job roles….”

Not good. Why? Because by suggesting action steps, you could be interrupting your client’s thinking. Because by suggesting action steps, you are doing your client’s work for him. Because by suggesting action steps, you are acting like a consultant, not a coach.

My point: Make sure you consistently refrain from advising others on what actions to take.

Question: How often do you refrain from advising others on what actions to take?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from advising others on what actions to take?

How often do you use affirmation to encourage others?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2011-04-14T20:34:00+09:00

Your client is sharing the results of the 2 action steps she’s taken to get better life balance. She walked for 30 minutes each day and is feeling more relaxed. And when her supervisor asked her to design a newsletter, she responded with, “I’m happy to design a newsletter. What would you like me to stop working on in order do this?” Her supervisor said she should stop work on a promotional video!

You look at your client and say, “You’ve made real progress on getting better life balance. You accomplished your 2 action steps. You’re more relaxed, and you took on a new task without increasing your overall workload. Good for you!” Your client has a big smile on her face. She looks encouraged.

My point: Use affirmation to encourage others.

Question: How often do you use affirmation to encourage others?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently use affirmation to encourage others. And when you give affirmation, make sure your affirmation is:

Growth-centered
Relevant
Authentic
Client-focused
Energizing
Specific

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently use affirmation to encourage others?

How often do you use clarification to encourage others?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2011-03-18T20:33:27+09:00

I’m talking with a friend about how I can more effectively help an organization build capacity. I share that I’m not sufficiently aware of how the organization is responding to my recommendations. My friend asks, “What do you mean by ‘not sufficiently aware’?” I explain that I get no feedback so I don’t know which (if any) recommendations the organization has processed, and I don’t know what the organization thinks of my recommendations.

Then I go on to describe how I got involved with the organization. I share that the organization has asked me to submit recommendations in writing and that I don’t have the opportunity to discuss my recommendations with someone on staff. My friend asks, “So are you saying that you want to talk through your recommendations with someone in the organization?”

I like his questions. I like his questions because they show he’s listening. And I like his questions because they show he’s interested in me and in what I’m saying. His use of clarification encourages me to keep thinking and to find ways to help the organization.

Question: How often do you use clarification to encourage others?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

My point: Make sure you consistently use clarification to encourage others.

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently use clarification to encourage others?

How often do you use “encouragers” to encourage others?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2011-02-18T09:32:40+09:00

In Japan, the listener shows that he’s listening by saying things like “hai hai,” (um hm) and “naruhodo” (I see). When the person talking hears these phrases, he’s encouraged to continue talking. In a real sense, these phrases are “encouragers.”

My point: Use “encouragers” to encourage your clients to keep talking and reflecting. When you’re coaching, say things like “yup,” “yes,” “um hmm,” “I see,” and “hmm.”

Question: How often do you use “encouragers” to encourage others?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Question: What will do to ensure that you consistently use “encouragers” to encourage others?

How often do you refrain from asking “why” questions?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2011-01-20T09:31:00+09:00

Ever been asked, “Why did you do that?” I have. While it does get me thinking, it also gets me feeling accused. And sometimes the feeling of being accused gets in the way of me thinking about why I did something.

The question “Why did you do that?” taps into childhood memories of really stupid things I’ve done (like when I was a young boy, I thought I could jump across a large manure pit, and fell in instead) and of my parents looking at me, wondering what I was thinking.

My point: If you want to help your coaching clients to reflect, and if you don’t want your clients feeling accused, refrain from asking “why” questions.

Question: How do often you refrain from asking “why” questions?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently refrain from asking “why” questions. One thing that helps me do this is asking questions that start with “what.” For example, “What caused you to do that?” (instead of “Why did you do that?”).

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from asking “why” questions?

How often do you target understanding?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-12-15T09:30:01+09:00

A key reason I get coaching is because I want to understand and be understood. I want to understand, for example, what’s happening with a transition to living in a different culture for 6 months, how I feel about it, and how I can use it to further my goals. And I want to be understood—I want my coach to understand what I’m thinking and feeling, for example, about living in a different culture.

I don’t get coaching because I want to be judged. I don’t get coaching so I can hear my coach say things like “Living in a different culture is a bad idea” or “You shouldn’t feel apprehensive about living in a different culture” or “That’s a stupid action step.”

My point: If you want to help your coaching clients, listen to them. And when you listen, target understanding (not judging).

Question: How often do you target understanding?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently target understanding. Things that help me do this include:

Remembering as a client how helpful it is when my coach really wants to understand me.
Remembering how much I dislike getting judged and how getting judging decreases my ability to reflect.

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently target understanding?

How often do you refrain from criticizing your client?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-11-16T09:28:04+09:00

I’ve gotten coaching on things that had obvious solutions. For example, I’ve gotten coaching on how avoid getting overloaded at a conference, when the (obvious) solution was to schedule down time. I’ve gotten coaching on which new goals to pursue, when the (obvious) solution was not to pursue any—my schedule was already full.

I’m glad that my coaches empowered me to discover effective action steps. I’m glad they didn’t say things like, “It’s a conference—you shouldn’t be focused on avoiding overload” or “Look, your schedule is already full, so thinking about which new goals to pursue is a bad idea.” I’m glad that coaches refrained from criticizing me.

Question: How often do you refrain from criticizing your client?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently refrain from criticizing your client. Things that help me do this include the following:

Remembering how criticism shuts down my thinking—and the thinking of my clients.
Focusing on helping my client discover action steps that will help him reach his goals.

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from criticizing your client?

How often do you make inviting statements?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-10-14T20:27:30+09:00

My client wants to prioritize her tasks. So, I start by asking questions like “What tasks need to get done?” and “What else?” My client mentions a variety of tasks, including updating materials for a workshop on personal productivity, finalizing a presentation on planning tools for the leadership team, and attending a network meeting of church planters. Then she pauses and says, “I really need to get after my workshop materials.”

I notice her emphasis on workshop materials. Instead of asking a question, I make an inviting statement: “You mentioned that you need to update workshop materials and then you came back to that again. Tell me more about that.” She shares that she’s concerned about the workshop materials and that she’s been wondering if she should expand the number of workshops she’s doing.

My point: Make inviting statements.

Question: How often do you make inviting statements?

Things that help me make inviting statements include the following:

Recognizing that inviting statements help me reflect.
Remembering that inviting statements are an effective alternative to questions.

Question: What will you do to ensure that you make inviting statements?

How often are you interested in what others say?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-09-16T20:26:02+09:00

Your mind is starting to wander. Your responses lack your usual focus and enthusiasm. When your calendar alarm goes off, you focus on it and miss a key thought your client has shared. And you’re concerned because you know these things indicate that you’re not really interested in what your client is saying.

Question: How often are you interested in what others say?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you’re consistently interested in what others say. Things that help me do this include the following:

Focusing on my client as a fellow Christian who is working to pursue his calling.
Making appropriate eye contact.
Removing distractions before I start coaching. For example, if I’m using videoconferencing to coach, I turn off all other software applications.

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently are interested in what others say?

How often do you refrain from suggesting options?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-08-16T20:24:00+09:00

Your client has explored what’s happening with her goal to make a career transition. You ask, “What can you do to move forward?” You wait about 15 seconds—your client doesn’t say anything. You rephrase the question and ask, “What are your options?’’ And you wait for about 10 seconds—your client doesn’t say anything. Then you say, “Here are 3 things you could do.…”

Not good. Why? Because by suggesting options you did the work your client is supposed to do. Because your suggestions interrupted some really good ideas your client was having—she wasn’t sitting there doing nothing. Because you hear your client say, “I appreciate your willingness to help. I was coming up with some good ideas, and when you gave your suggestions, I focused on listening to you. Now I’m having trouble remembering what I was thinking.” Ouch.

Question: How often to you refrain from suggesting options?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently refrain from suggesting options. Things that help me do this include the following:

Remembering that silence indicates reflection, not the absence of reflection.
Remembering that brainstorming options helps my client get motivated for action. And I want my client motivated for action.

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from suggesting options?

How often do you refrain from describing your client’s reality?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-07-11T00:23:07+09:00

Your client is talking about what’s happening with his goal to plan more effectively. You easily relate to this—a few years back you had a similar goal. Since then, you’ve done research on planning, coached 27 clients who are working on planning, and developed a 5-phase planning framework.

As you listen to your client, you think, “He’s at phase 2.” Your client pauses, and you hear yourself say, “As best I can tell, you’re in phase 2—you’re working and you have a plan. Since you don’t yet have a good documented plan, you follow your gut more than your plan.”

Then you recognize that you just described your client’s reality—something you don’t want to do. Because you want your client thinking, and when you describe your client’s reality, he’s not thinking.

Question: How often do you refrain from describing your client’s reality?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently refrain from describing your client’s reality. Two things that help me do this are:

Remembering that my client is the expert in his life—not me. He knows his reality.
Remembering that my goal is to get my client thinking about his reality.

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from describing your client’s reality?

How often do you refrain from suggesting goals for the coaching session?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-06-14T21:21:49+09:00

You ask your client, “What would you like to accomplish as a result of talking today?” Your client responds, “I didn’t really think about what I wanted to accomplish today. Nothing’s coming to mind. Got any ideas?”

This has happened with this client before. You quickly process through previous coaching sessions and think of 3 possible goals for the session. And you say, “How about how to handle email more effectively, how to make more time to talk with the kids, or how to more effectively target personal strengths?”

After asking the question, you realize that you’re suggesting goals for the coaching session. This is something you don’t want to do. Why? Because your client grows as she takes responsibility for identifying goals for a coaching session.

Question: How often do you refrain from suggesting goals for the coaching session?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently refrain from suggesting goals for the coaching sessions. Things that help me do this include the following:

Sharing with new and current clients that they are responsible for setting goals for coaching sessions and that setting goals helps them grow.
Recognizing that if a client doesn’t have a goal for a session, now is a good time to have the client develop a list of goals.

Question: What will you do to ensure that you consistently refrain from suggesting goals for the coaching session?

How can you focus others?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-12-15T09:51:58+09:00

By asking questions like:

What’s your mission statement?
What excites/concerns you about the mission?
How does your work help achieve the mission?
What helps you achieve the mission? What gets in your way?
On a scale of 1-5 (5 being high), how focused are you on your mission statement?
What can you do to increase your focus?
What will you do?

How can you help others to work smarter?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2011-03-18T20:50:50+09:00

By asking questions like:

What’s your ministry?
How do you feel about your ministry and your workload?
How interested are you in getting more done in the same amount of time?
What helps you work efficiently and effectively? What doesn’t help you?
What can you do to work smarter?
What will you do?

How can you help others pursue excellence?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2011-05-11T02:49:00+09:00

By asking questions like:

What’s excellence?
What’s satisfying/unsatisfying about pursuing organizational excellence?
For your ministry, what does organizational excellence look like?
What can you do to pursue organizational excellence?
What will you do?

Want to empower others to reduce their frustrations?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-06-14T22:33:29+09:00

Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:

What are 5 frustrations you have?
How do you feel when these frustrations are present/not present?
How would you feel if you could reduce 1 or more of these 5 frustrations?
How would reducing 1 or more frustrations impact your ministry?
If you reduced all 5 frustrations, what might happen?
What helps you reduce your frustrations? What hinders you?
What’s 1 frustration you want to reduce?
What can you do to reduce that frustration?
What will you do?

How can you focus others?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-05-18T02:31:00+09:00

By asking questions like:

What’s your mission statement?
What excites/concerns you about the mission?
How does your work help achieve the mission?
What helps you achieve the mission? What gets in your way?
On a scale of 1-5 (5 being high), how focused are you on your mission statement?
What can you do to increase your focus?
What will you do?

Leaders, empower others by asking questions

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-09-16T21:28:18+09:00

Do you want to empower others? Do you want to empower others to focus, solve problems, and achieve their goals? If so, provoke them. Provoke them to reflect.

Reflection is powerful. Personally speaking, reflection helps me clarify my ministry goals, increase awareness of my progress, identify things that are hindering my progress, and develop action steps. In short, reflection helps me do ministry.

I’ve seen reflection help fellow staff members at Christian Academy in Japan (CAJ). After reflecting, staff members were more focused on their goals, managed their time better, and led meetings more effectively.

But don’t take my word for it. I asked CAJ staff members to tell me how reflection empowers them. Here’s what they said: “Reflection helps me get clear on what’s going on so I can make effective decisions.” “Reflection helps me organize my tasks and next actions.” “Reflection helps me handle situations more effectively.”

So, how can you provoke reflection? By asking open-ended questions:

If your co-worker wants to more effectively disciple others, ask: How do you disciple people now? What’s causing you to want to improve? What’s “more effective discipleship” look like? What can you do?
If your team is planning an event, ask: What do we want to see happen? What will help this go well? Who’s going to do what?
If a pastor is dealing with conflict, ask: What happened? How do you feel? How does the other person see the situation? How can you demonstrate Christ’s love?
If a small group leader wants to help her members to be more engaged, ask: If your members got more engaged, what might happen? What helps your members get engaged? When are your participants not engaged? What can you do?

Bottom line: Empower other by asking questions.

*Want to empower others to ask questions? Then ask them questions like:

What problems are those around you facing?
What goals are they trying to achieve?
What excites/concerns you about empowering others by asking questions?
To what extent do you ask questions to help others focus? Prioritize? Solve problems?
How could you more effectively use questions to empower others?
What will you do?

Use the GROW process

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-04-01T00:58:55+09:00

The GROW process is a user-friendly process you can use to coach others (Goal • Reality • Options • Will do).

Use LIFE skills

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-04-01T00:57:07+09:00

When coaching, listen, inquire, focus, and encourage.

The coach's heart

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-04-01T00:55:00+09:00

Christian coaching flows from the heart, from beliefs about empowering others.

Use coaching to empower others

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-04-01T00:54:01+09:00

If you want to empower others, use a coaching approach.

To encourage coaching, get staff to ask questions

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-01-22T13:42:43+09:00

Want to encourage coaching in your organization? One way I encourage coaching is by developing sets of questions to be used in meetings and workshops. As a result of using sets of questions in meetings and workshops, staff have shifted toward asking questions and away from giving advice.

In the planning sessions I'm facilitating today, participants are using the following sets of questions to help others reflect:

Set 1

What’s your mission?
What’s it take to carry out your mission?
What’s already been accomplished?
What helps you?
What hinders you?
What are your options?
What will you do to achieve your goals?

Set 2

What is your mission? What are your goals?
How would you categorize progress on your goals? Why?
To what extent do your current action steps help you address your goals?

Set 3

What topics did you talk about in your tactical meeting?
What action steps are you going to take before your next meeting?
What did you learn by trying out different roles?
What will help your team work together better?

What helps a mission move toward coaching?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-06-02T15:22:47+09:00

The following is the transcript of an interview about moving a mission toward coaching. The interviewee is a veteran missionary.

What challenges do your mission staff face? Missionaries need greater clarity on ministry goals and when enough work is enough. Life balance issues are huge. Our missionaries need more support to put into practice what they already know.

What do your missionaries know about coaching? There’s a general awareness of coaching. About 50% of our people have had some exposure to coaching. Some have received coaching, and some have been in 1-day coaching workshops.

What excites you about having your missionaries get coaching? When people get coached, they make progress. Sometimes they get clear on what their goals are. Through coaching, our staff would receive strategic encouragement.

What concerns you? Some feel that coaching is a fad, so it might be hard to move in this direction. Another thing is that there’s the danger of coaches stepping out of their role and giving direction.

If your mission members got coaching, what might happen? People would be more focused on what they came to do, what they should be about, and confident that they’re doing what they should be doing.

What helps you move your mission toward getting your missionaries involved in coaching? A network of other coaches who prod me to continue on this path.

What hinders you? Busyness. Other things. Limited authority.

What are your options? I can keep on coaching people. I can encourage people to get coach training and to get a coach.

What will you do? I’m going to talk with the person responsible for member care about coaching.

How can you improve your coaching?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-12-22T07:35:29+09:00

When I think of improving my coaching, 3 areas come to mind. Those 3 areas are beliefs, skills, and process.

How can you encourage coaching in your organization?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-12-08T07:23:54+09:00

That’s a good question. Let me respond by asking you a question: What encouraged you to get coached and to coach others? Figure out what encouraged you and use that to encourage coaching in your organization.

What initially encouraged me to get coached was reading about coaching and talking with a friend about how coaching encouraged him and helped him achieve his goals. What really sold me on getting coached was the results I got from getting coached—I felt encouraged, I was better able to achieve my personal and professional goals, and I was empowered to pursue God’s calling.

What encouraged me to coach others was the results I got from getting coached, talking with a friend who coached others, reading books, and completing a coaching certification program.

Question: So, how can you encourage coaching in your organization?

Answer: Based on what encouraged me to get coaching and coach others, I suggest you consider taking action steps like:

Continuing getting coached yourself, coaching others, and talking about the results of coaching.
Helping leaders understand what coaching is and how they can benefit from it.
Getting leaders to receive coaching.
Training leaders to coach others.
Getting leaders to start coaching key staff members and use coaching skills throughout the day.
Helping staff understand what coaching is and how they can benefit from it.
Getting more and more staff to receiving coaching.
Training staff to coach others.
Getting staff to start coaching other staff members and use coaching skills throughout the day.

You might be thinking, “Looks like I should take those steps in the order they are listed.” I can see why you would think that, and generally speaking, taking the steps in the order listed is helpful. But, there is no one right way to do it—for example, you can take the steps in a different order if that is what works best for you and your organization.

Question: How can you determine the action steps you want to take and the sequence of those action steps?

Answer: I suggest that you get a team together and:

Share what encouraged you to get coached, what encouraged you to coach others, and how coaching has helped you and others.
Reflect on the benefits of establishing a coaching culture.
Take a self-assessment on how a coaching culture could help your organization, and discuss your assessment results.
Review the action steps listed above. Then, determine what action steps you will take and the order of those action steps.

Question: What might encouraging coaching in your organization look like?

Answer: Here’s an example. Let’s assume you’ve already talked with your team about establishing a coaching culture, and you’ve determined that you want to start by introducing everyone to coaching through a 3-hour workshop:

Your goals for the workshop include having participants:

Reflect on the power of questions.
Understand what coaching is and how it works.
Experience leading by asking questions/coaching.
Get more interested in getting coached and getting coach training.

To prepare leaders and staff for the workshop, you:

Ask them to take a short online tutorial on exploring getting coaching.
Encourage key staff (especially the members of your team) to experience coaching by providing coaching sessions at their convenience.

Then during the 3-hour workshop, you have participants:

(10 minutes) Listen to 1 or more testimonials on how coaching has helped.
(10 minutes) Watch 2 people model coaching by using a set of questions, for example: What people/projects are you spending your time/energy on? What’s been satisfying/frustrating? What are the reasons for your feelings of satisfaction/frustration? What do you think you’ll do?
(25 minutes) Use a set of questions to talk with a partner (What people/projects are you spending your time/energy on? What’s been satisfying/frustrating? What are the reasons for your feelings of satisfaction/frustration? How can I pray for you?). Then, pray together.
(20 minutes) Reflect on why God asks questions.
(30 minutes) Read and discuss 1 or more articles on Christian coaching that include an emphasis on asking questions, for example: “Lead by Asking Questions,” “The Startup Guide to Coaching Leaders,” “The Coaching Approach to Growth,” “The Heart of a Coach,” and “What is ‘Coaching’ to You?” (Additional resources are available through Close the Gap Now, Creative Results Management, The Christian Coaching Center, and Coach22.)
(15 minutes) Break
(20 minutes) Take and discuss a self-assessment on leading by asking questions.
(25 minutes) Use a set of questions to help a partner process something. (Time permitting, debrief this.)
(15 minutes) Use a set of questions to debrief the workshop, for example: What did we do during the workshop? What excites/concerns you about leading by asking questions? What excites/concerns you about coaching? What insights did you have? How could leading by asking questions/coaching help us? What’s next? (This can be done in partners/small groups and then as a whole group.)
(10 minutes) Receive information about how they can get coach training and coaching.

After the workshop, you will:

Continue getting coached, coaching others, and talking about the results of coaching.
Continue meeting as a team to talk about encouraging coaching and to identify action steps.
Provide coaching and encourage staff (especially leaders) to receive coaching.
Provide coach training.
Provide reading material.

Reflect: How are you going to encourage coaching in your organization? What action steps are you going to take? In what order?

*Want additional resources on coaching?

Tutorials
Videos
Blog entries on coaching culture
Books
Newsletters
Training: Close the Gap Now, Creative Results Management

Help missionaries feel good about getting coaching

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-11-03T08:12:40+09:00

You're a missionary serving in Latin America. You send monthly newsletters to your supporters, and you send monthly reports to your mission. Each time you send a newsletter, you receive encouraging emails and notes; each time you send a report, you receive an acknowledgement (and most times not even that). Unless things aren't going well—then you receive “feedback.”

Now you learn that your mission wants to encourage you to get coaching.

How do you feel about getting coaching? I wouldn’t be feeling good. And I'd be thinking, "Am I doing something wrong? Is something not going well? I think things are going well, so maybe coaching is for others. The mission tends to offer help when things aren't going well, so coaching probably wouldn't be useful."

My point: If you want missionaries to feel good about getting coaching, you may need to help them see coaching as a way of getting positive feedback. You can do this by:

Explaining that the coach provides encouragement (not criticism).
Sharing that coaching is a way to build on strengths.
Emphasizing that in coaching, the client (not the supervisor) decides what to work on.

What are some other ways you can help missionaries feel good about getting coaching?

How can you help missionaries value growth?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-09-02T14:01:06+09:00

If you want to help missionaries value getting coaching, you may need to start by helping them value personal and professional growth. Why? Because coaching is about growth, and if missionaries don’t value growth, they won’t seek coaching.

Question: Why might missionaries not value personal and professional growth?

Answer: Because they focus on serving others. Because they work in an organization that doesn’t have an organizational growth plan or a professional development plan. Because their mission doesn’t emphasize personal or professional growth.

Question: How can you help missionaries value growth?

Answer: By asking questions like “If you could grow in one area of your life, what would it be?” And by encouraging missions to develop organizational growth plans and professional development plans—this will help missions emphasize personal and professional growth.

Question: What strategies have you found useful in helping missionaries value personal and professional growth?

How can you help missionaries value getting asked questions?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-08-29T07:35:53+09:00

Missionaries want to proclaim the good news of Jesus. So, they do evangelism, baptize and disciple believers, and preach during worship services. God uses these activities to build His kingdom. These activities tend to flow from an advice-giving paradigm, rather than a question-asking paradigm.

Implications: Missionaries have more experience with giving advice than with asking questions. And missionaries value getting advice than more than getting asked questions—which is one reason they don’t pursue getting coaching.

Question: How can you help missionaries value getting asked questions?

My answer: I’m publishing sets of coaching questions in a quarterly magazine that missionaries I know read. I’m encouraging missions to publish short articles on asking questions.

Question: What strategies have you found useful in helping missionaries value getting asked questions?

How would establishing a coaching culture help your organization?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-08-15T05:21:08+09:00

In a coaching culture, staff members empower each other through listening, inquiry, focusing on SMART actions, and encouragement. To find out how establishing a coaching culture would help you, take the following self-assessment (download). Circle the number that comes closest to representing how true the statement is for your organization right now. Use the following scale:

4: Consistently • 3: Usually • 2: Sometimes • 1: Rarely

Culture
___ We communicate effectively.
___ We have good morale.
___ We have good staff longevity.
___ We support staff to achieve work-related goals.
___ We support staff to achieve personal goals.
___ We don’t experience fear of change.
___ We collaborate (instead of conflicting).
___ We focus on results (instead of activity).
___ We focus on the mission (instead of other good things).
___ We focus on working smarter (instead of working harder).
___ We pursue defined goals (instead of pursuing undefined goals).

Coaching skills
___ We listen (instead of talking).
___ We inquire (instead of giving advice).
___ We focus others on taking SMART actions (instead of letting others take undefined action).
___ We encourage (instead of criticizing).

Coaching skills usage
___ We use coaching skills to move in new directions.
___ We use coaching skills to influence each other.
___ We use coaching skills to collaborate with each other.
___ We empower others to solve their problems (instead of solving others’ problems).
___ We support, encourage, and hold others accountable to achieve goals more (instead of just assigning goals).

Coaching culture building blocks
___ Leaders receive coaching.
___ Leaders have taken at least 12-hours of coach training.
___ Leaders coach staff.
___ Leaders use coaching skills throughout the day.
___ Leaders communicate about how coaching helps them and the organization.
___ Staff understand what coaching is and how they can benefit from it.
___ Staff receive coaching.

Now, ask yourself 5 questions about the data:

How many 4s, 3s, 2s, and 1s do I have?
What excites/concerns me about the data?
How would establishing a coaching culture help?
What can I do to encourage the development of a coaching culture?
What will I do?

Empower others. Develop a coaching culture.

Lead with questions

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-07-20T16:36:56+09:00

Leaders empower others. A key way leaders empower others is by asking questions.

How can you help missionaries value getting asked questions?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-07-03T11:51:59+09:00

Missionaries want to proclaim the good news of Jesus. So, they do evangelism, baptize and disciple believers, and preach during worship services. God uses these activities to build His kingdom. These activities tend to flow from an advice-giving paradigm, rather than a question-asking paradigm.

Implications: Missionaries have more experience with giving advice than with asking questions. And missionaries value getting advice than more than getting asked questions—which is one reason they don't pursue getting coaching.

Question: How can you help missionaries value getting asked questions?

My answer: By publishing sets of coaching questions in a quarterly magazine (Japan Harvest) that missionaries I know read. By encouraging missions to publish short articles on asking questions. Here's an example.

Question: What strategies have you found useful in helping missionaries value getting asked questions?

Lead by asking questions

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-06-17T14:01:24+09:00

To get an idea of how you can more effectively lead by asking questions, complete the following self-assessment (or download it here). Rate each item, using the following scale:

4: Consistently • 3: Usually • 2: Sort of • 1: Rarely

Lead from your heart
___ I trust that the Holy Spirit is working in the heart of every believer.
___ I believe others can define and achieve their goals.
___ I target motivation, not information.

How often do you refrain from giving advice/suggestions?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-04-16T08:38:00+09:00

You want to help people. I do, too. One way to help people is by giving advice. But there are some definite downsides to giving advice:

You might irritate someone by giving unsolicited advice.
Your advice might work for you and not for the person you’re talking to.
If someone takes your advice and it doesn’t work, that might harm your relationship.
Giving advice doesn’t target developing the person into a better problem solver—it targets solving the immediate problem.

I don't want to irritate people, give advice that doesn’t work, put my relationships at risk, or only solve the immediate problem. I want people to solve their own problems by developing as problem solvers. So, I strive to refrain from giving advice.

Question: How often do you refrain from giving advice?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Strive to consistently refrain from giving advice. Strive to consistently focus on what others think in order to help them become better problem solvers. When you are tempted to give advice or when you find yourself focusing on what you are thinking, ask an open-ended question instead:

What’s your goal?
What’s going on?
What are your options?
What will you do?

Question: What action steps will you take to ensure that you consistently refrain from giving advice?

How often do you use restatement to encourage others?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-03-17T08:35:00+09:00

I like getting encouragement. I like it more than getting critiques. Encouragement feels better and actually results in me working more effectively.

I believe in the power of encouragement, so I want to encourage others. One way I encourage others is by listening to what they say. And one way I demonstrate that I’m listening is by restating what the other person has been saying. Through restatement I show I’ve been listening and that I want to understand. For example, I might say, “If I understand correctly, you’re saying that ___. Is that right?”

Question: How often do you use restatement to encourage others?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Strive to consistently use restatement to encourage others. To encourage others, say things like: So what I think I hear you saying is ___. Is that right?

Question: What action steps will you take to ensure that you consistently encourage others through restatement?

*To learn more about encouraging others, click here.

How often do you focus others on developing SMART action steps?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-02-08T07:30:00+09:00

What helps me get my goals accomplished? Developing my own action steps, action steps that I’m motivated to take and that are SMART. I don't have the same success rate when someone else develops the action steps and when the action steps are not SMART.

I’m sold on developing my own SMART action steps. And when I work with others, I work to focus them on developing their own SMART action steps.

Question: How often do you focus others on developing SMART action steps?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently focus others on developing SMART action steps. What helps me do this consistently is asking questions like:

Specific: What do you mean by ___?
Measurable: How will you know when you’ve achieved your action step?
Attainable: How doable is this?
Relevant: How will this action step help you achieve your goal?
Timebound: When will you do this?

Question: What action steps will you take to ensure that you consistently focus others on developing SMART action steps?

*To learn more about focusing others, click here.

How often do you ask open-ended questions?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2010-01-11T08:27:00+09:00

Reflection is powerful. Reflection helps me identify my goals, better understand my current situation, and consider what I can do to move forward on my goals. I regularly take time to reflect and to encourage others to reflect.

How can you help others reflect? By asking open-ended questions. By asking questions like “What are your priorities?” and “What can you do to pursue God’s calling?”

Question: How often do you ask open-ended questions?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently ask open-ended questions. What has helped me to do this is:

Reading books on open-ended questions, like Bobb Biehl’s Asking to Win.
Developing a set of go-to questions, for example: What’s your goal? What’s going on? What can you do? What will you do?

Question: What action steps will you take to ensure that you consistently ask open-ended questions?

*To learn more about asking questions, click here.

How often do you follow the 80/20 Rule?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-12-12T09:20:10+09:00

Want to empower people? Want to develop leaders? Want to help others become better problem solvers and solve their problems? If so, try this one thing. It’s free. You can do it anywhere. And those you talk with like it.

What is it? It’s the 80/20 Rule. The 80/20 Rule says that in each conversation, you should listen 80% of the time and talk 20% of the time.

Question: How often do you talk 20% of the time?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently follow the 80/20 Rule. To do this, you’re going to have to keep the other person talking. What I do to keep others talking (so I can listen) is make inviting statements (Tell me more about that.) and ask open-ended questions like “What’s a key challenge you’re facing?”

Question: What action steps will you take to ensure that you consistently talk a maximum of 20% of the time?

*To learn more about listening, click here.

Empower others to strategically pursue God's calling

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-06-19T07:36:27+09:00

Your client wants to clarify and strategically pursue God’s calling. That’s great!

Question: How can you empower your client to do this?

How often do you empower others to develop SMART action steps?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-11-14T07:28:00+09:00

We all want to accomplish our goals. To accomplish our goals, we need to take action steps. I’ve found that the SMARTer the action step, the more likely I am to accomplish it. A SMART action steps is:

Specific
Measurable
Attainable
Relevant
Timebound

“Get in shape” is not a SMART action step, and it’s actually not that easy to accomplish. “Walk for 30 minutes 3 times per week for 1 month” is a SMART action step, and it’s actually easier to accomplish than “Get in shape.”

Question: How often do you empower others to develop SMART action steps for each of their goals?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently empower others to develop SMART actions steps for each of their goals. If the person you’re talking to develops general action steps, help them SMARTen them up by asking questions like:

Specific: What do you mean by ___?
Measurable: How will you know when you’ve achieved your action step?
Attainable: How doable is this?
Relevant: How will this action step help you achieve your goal?
Timebound: When will you do this?

Question: What action steps will you take to ensure that you consistently empower others to develop SMART action steps for each of their goals?

*To learn more about coaching others on taking action, click here.

How often do you empower others to brainstorm options?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-10-13T08:20:00+09:00

Sometimes I get stuck. I have a problem, and I can’t find a way to solve it. Then, I remember to brainstorm my options, to think outside the box. In short order, I’m unstuck and on my way to solving my problem. Brainstorming works for me. And I’ve found that brainstorming helps others.

Question: How often do you empower others to brainstorm options?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently empower others to brainstorm options. To help others brainstorm options, I like to ask “What are your options?” and “What else?”

Question: What action steps will you take to ensure that you consistently empower others to brainstorm options?

*To learn more about coaching on options, click here.

How often do you empower others to explore their current reality?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-09-14T08:16:00+09:00

You want to achieve your goal. And you want to take action now! Ever feel like that? I have. I like the energy, but I don’t necessarily like the results.

Why? Because when I take action without reflecting on my current reality, I forget to take into account things like family plans and my overall workload. What happens? I achieve things I don’t want (like family disharmony and personal fatigue), and I don’t achieve my goal.

Question: How often do you empower others to explore their current reality?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Make sure you consistently empower others to explore their current reality. What helps me do this is asking open-ended questions:

What’s happening?
How do you feel about this?
How is God using _______ in your life?
What are some other ways to look at this?

Question: What action steps will you take to ensure that you consistently empower others to explore their reality?

*To learn more about coaching others on the reality of their goals, click here.

How often are you clear on the other person’s goal?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-08-14T08:10:00+09:00

You’re coaching Toru. You have 30 minutes to help Toru achieve his goal. To use this time effectively, make sure you are clear on Toru’s goal. Otherwise, you’ll waste Toru’s time by asking irrelevant questions.

Question: How often are you clear on the other person’s goal?

Consistently?
Usually?
Sometimes?
Rarely?

Ask questions to help those around you

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-06-02T16:50:22+09:00

Ask questions to help those around you to focus, think through problems, and reach their goals. For example:

If your co-worker wants to more effectively disciple others, ask: How do you disciple people now? What’s causing you to want to improve? What’s “more effective discipleship” look like? What can you do?

Ask questions to help others reduce their frustrations

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-05-27T11:01:42+09:00

Want to help others to reduce their frustrations? Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:

What are 5 frustrations you have?
How do you feel when these frustrations are present/not present?
How would you feel if you could reduce 1 or more of these 5 frustrations?
How would reducing 1 or more frustrations impact your ministry?
If you reduced all 5 frustrations, what might happen?
What helps you reduce your frustrations? What hinders you?
What’s 1 frustration you want to reduce?
What can you do to reduce that frustration?
What will you do?

Ask questions to help others get organized

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-05-27T10:59:16+09:00

Want to help others to get organized? Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:

What’s your primary workspace like?
What tools do you use to get organized?
How do you feel when you’re organized/disorganized?
For you, what does being organized look like?
On a scale of 1-10 (10 being high), how organized are you?
On a scale of 1-10 (10 being high), how organized do you want to be?
If you were more organized, what might happen?
To get organized, what do you need to keep doing? start doing? stop doing?
What will you do?

Ask questions to help others target their strengths

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-05-27T10:59:03+09:00

Want to help others to target their strengths? Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:

What strengths has God given you to pursue His calling? (What truths has God taught you? What relationships has He provided? What abilities, character traits, experiences, and education has He given you?)
What excites/frustrates you about your God-given strengths?
How do you feel when you can/can’t use your strengths?
How does targeting your strengths impact ministry?
If you targeted your strengths more, what might happen?
What helps you target your strengths? What hinders you?
What 2-3 strengths do you want to target?
What can you do to target those 2-3 God-given strengths?
What will you do?

Ask questions help others pay attention to their goals

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-05-27T10:56:51+09:00

Want to help others pay attention to their goals? Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:

What are your goals?
What satisfies/concerns you about your progress?
What do you like/dislike about paying attention to your goals?
How does paying attention to your goals help you accomplish them?
If you paid more attention to your goals, what might happen?
On a scale of 1-10 (10 being high), how much attention do you pay to your goals?
On a scale of 1-10 (10 being high), how much attention do you want to pay to your goals?
What helps you pay attention on your goals?
What will you do?

Ask questions to help others prioritize

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-04-23T19:35:18+09:00

Want to help others prioritize? Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:

What are you working on?
What satisfies/concerns you about your progress?
What do you want to accomplish in the next month?
Which of these things would you categorize as big priorities? Medium priorities? Small priorities?
What can you do to ensure that the big priorities get accomplished?
What do you think you’ll do?
Would you like to talk again about your priorities?

Reflection can help you pursue your God-given calling

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-04-08T14:31:33+09:00

It's important to pursue your God-given calling. Reflecting can help. Here are 7 questions you can reflect on.

How can you empower others even more effectively?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-07-08T08:18:01+09:00

Through Christian coaching, you can empower others to pursue God’s call. To get an idea of how you can empower others even more effectively, complete the following self-assessment that addresses coaching beliefs, skills, and process.

Ask questions to help others get clear

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-01-24T11:42:18+09:00

Want to help others know where they are and where they want to go? Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:

What’s your mission?
To carry out your mission, what goals do you need to achieve?
Where are you in terms of progress on each of your goals?
What satisfies/concerns you about your progress?
What helps you achieve your goals?
What hinders you?
How can you build on your progress/minimize your roadblocks?
What will you do to make progress on your goals?

Ask questions to help others focus

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-01-23T15:41:30+09:00

Want to help others focus on the right things? Ask questions. Ask questions that provoke reflection, for example:

What’s going on in your ministry?
What people/projects are you spending your time/energy on?
What are your goals for this next week/month?
Whom do you talk to about your ministry?
What’s been satisfying/frustrating?
What are the reasons for your feelings of satisfaction and frustration?
How can you build on your progress/minimize your roadblocks?
What do you think you’ll do?

Ask 1 person 1 question today

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-01-22T08:40:10+09:00

What’s God calling you do to?
What’s your goal?
What’s going on?
How does God see this?
How is God using this in your life?
How can you achieve your God-given mission?
What will you do?

What is coaching?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-12-29T08:58:25+09:00

Considering getting coaching? If so, be sure you know what coaching is.

Question: What is coaching?

To get an answer to this question, do 3 things.

What could you work on with a coach?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-12-29T09:56:19+09:00

Thinking about getting coaching? If so, you might be wondering what you can work on with a coach.

A coach will come along side you and empower you to:

Live your values
Build relationships
Communicate effectively

What's already been accomplished?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-12-12T08:13:26+09:00

Three weeks ago, Tim was appointed as field director for his mission. Sitting across the table from you, he says, “Being a mission field director is challenging. I feel good about my new role. I’ve been asking God how He wants me to use the gifts He’s given me, and He answered—I’m now the field director.

Getting 300% more training impact

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-11-08T07:02:00+09:00

Dr. Keith E. Webb

Let's be honest, most training is full of knowledge, ideas, and "good stuff" but not much practice.

Coach from your heart

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-11-07T10:52:10+09:00

Through coaching, you can empower others to grow. While effective coaching does involve technique, at a deeper level effective coaching is about your heart, about your beliefs, about who you are. Coach from your heart.

GROW process helps church

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-10-23T08:32:24+09:00

Imagine that you are a church planter in Japan. Imagine that you want your church members to think about a current challenge. What can you do? You can use the GROW process.

Want to achieve your goals?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-09-29T14:00:21+09:00

The point is not to have goals. The point is to achieve goals. To achieve your goals, take 4 steps: pray, put, take, and reflect.

Ask yourself 4 questions

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-09-29T08:07:04+09:00

(1) Want to celebrate progress?
(2) Feel like reflecting on a current challenge?
(3) Going crazy due to a job change?
(4) Or need to talk through something unexpected?

If so, get a coach!

To empower others, provoke reflection

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-09-27T15:01:33+09:00

Want to empower others? Provoke them to reflect. How? By asking open-ended questions.

SMARTen up your goals

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-09-26T14:48:15+09:00

You’re pursuing God’s calling. Good. Three weeks ago, you developed a list 5 goals that are part of pursuing God’s calling:

Pray more.
Make spouse happy.
Answer email immediately.
Coach students.
Provide training for Christian schools.

Now, you’re seated at your desk, reflecting on your goals.

Achieve your goals

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-07-15T17:38:39+09:00

Goals help. Goals help you get focused, get energized, get organized, and know what to say “yes” and “no” to.

But having goals is not enough. You don’t just want to have goals—you want to achieve goals. You want to achieve your goals in order to pursue your God-given calling. Is there something you can to do increase the likelihood that you’ll achieve your goals? Yes!

Use sets of questions

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-08-21T10:48:36+09:00

Want to promote reflection in your organization? Design sets of questions and have partners use them as they dialog. Here are 3 sets of questions I designed and then had our mission's EurAsia Team use:

Personal life

When you were in 4th grade, where did you live? What did you enjoy doing?
What’s easy/challenging about living in your country of service?
In your recent personal life, what’s been encouraging/discouraging?
Overall, how are you feeling?
How can I pray for you?

How can you continue to make progress?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-05-14T08:21:10+09:00

“This coaching series has been life changing,” says Trudi, a secretary at an international Christian school in Singapore. It’s her final coaching session. She adds, “I’ve gotten a better understanding of God’s calling for me. My personal mission statement gives me something to focus on. And the 5 goals I’ve developed for carrying out my mission help me take action on my mission. I want to keep at it.”

Question: What can you ask Trudi?

What will you do this week?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-04-09T08:31:44+09:00

“One of my overall goals is to provide resources for church members that help them pursue God’s calling,” says Bill, a pastor of a 250-member congregation in London.

It’s Bill’s first coaching session, and for the next 30 minutes, you ask Bill questions to provoke him to reflect.

What will you do to achieve your goals?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-03-11T08:38:36+09:00

“This coaching series has helped me clarify God’s calling,” says Tomoko, a leadership developer based in Cambodia. “I like my personal mission statement: Empowering Christians to pursue God’s calling."

What are your options for achieving your goals?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-02-13T07:37:08+09:00

You’re coaching Tomoko, a leadership developer based in Cambodia who wants to clarify God’s calling. She’s made good progress. She’s developed a mission statement, identified 6 goals she needs to accomplish in order to carry out her mission, and reflected on what’s already been accomplished for each of her goals. During her last coaching session, she reflected on what helps and hinders her in achieving her goals.

What helps/hinders you in achieving your goals?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2009-01-31T08:34:39+09:00

Tomoko, a leadership developer based in Cambodia, has been working for several weeks to clarify God’s calling. In previous coaching sessions, she’s:

Identified 4 problems and 3 opportunities she’s passionate about & blessed by God to address.
Developed a mission statement.
Identified 6 goals she needs to accomplish to carry out her mission.
Reflected on what’s already been accomplished for each of her 6 goals.

What's already been accomplished?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-02-12T08:33:03+09:00

What's it take to carry out your God-given mission?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-11-18T12:31:26+09:00

You’re coaching Mark, a math teacher at an international Christian school in Korea. He wants to clarify God’s calling. In previous sessions, he identified the problems/opportunities he’s passionate about and blessed by God to address. He also drafted a personal mission statement: Equipping Christians to live for Jesus.

What’s your mission?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-11-06T08:29:13+09:00

“What I want to do is to develop a personal mission statement,” says Mark, a high school math teacher at an international Christian school in Korea. “I’m fairly clear on the problems/opportunities God is calling me to address. Having a mission statement will help me focus on these problems/opportunities.”

Question: What can you ask Mark?

What problems/opportunities are you passionate about & blessed by God to address?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-09-30T08:25:41+09:00

You’re listening to Carla, a 43-year-old office worker. She’s experiencing significant change, including a new home, a new pastor at church, and her youngest child starting high school. Carla tells you that as a result of the changes she’s experiencing, she’s more sensitive to her own needs and the needs of others.

How has God blessed you pursue His calling?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-08-28T08:56:37+09:00

You’re coaching Bob. He shares that he’s turning 47, his oldest child is now a freshman in college, his best friend recently moved to the United Kingdom, and he’s thinking about changing careers. As Bob talks about what’s he’s experiencing, it becomes clear that Bob wants to clarify God’s calling in his life. He wants to develop a personal mission statement and to design goals to achieve that mission statement.

Question: What can you ask Bob to help him get started?

Use questions to help your client clarify God’s calling

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-08-08T01:57:46+09:00

Your client wants clarify God’s calling. Asking questions will help.

Here are 10 questions you can ask:

How has God blessed you to pursue His calling?”
What problems and opportunities are you passionate about & blessed by God to address?
What’s your mission?
What’s it take to carry out your God-given mission?
What’s already been accomplished?
What helps/hinders you in achieving your goals?
What are your options for achieving your goals?
What will you do to achieve your goals?
What will you do this week?
How can you continue to make progress?

People grow as they take responsibility

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-06-10T13:12:16+09:00

People grow as they take responsibility by defining, committing to, and achieving goals. I know I grow when I take responsibility. I’ll bet you do, too.

As a coach, you can empower others to take responsibility.

Growing is more about motivation than information

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-05-21T12:52:32+09:00

Leaders grow as they take action to achieve their goals. Taking action is more about being motivated than about having information. If I’m not motivated, I won’t take action—even if I have good information.

How to write a SMART goal

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-05-02T15:47:32+09:00

Asking questions doesn't always work

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-05-02T15:45:05+09:00

Coaching is a conversation, in which the coach provokes the client to reflect by asking questions. But asking questions doesn't always work, as the video demonstrates.

To cultivate a coaching culture, use a set of questions

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-04-12T12:58:07+09:00

What's a good way to cultivate a coaching culture? Having staff members ask each other a prescribed set of questions. Doing this results in staff members coaching and receiving coaching—without being trained in coaching.

Here's a sample set of questions for a coaching session:

What’s going on in your work?

What people/projects are you spending your time/energy on?

What are your goals for this next week/month?

Whom do you talk to about your work? What do you talk about?

What progress on your goals have you experienced? What’s been satisfying?

What roadblocks have you experienced? What’s been frustrating?

What are the reasons for your feelings of satisfaction and frustration?

What can you do to build on your progress/minimize your roadblocks? Who can help you?

You talked about ___ today. What do you think you’ll do?

How can I pray for you?

Believe in others

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-04-09T10:01:50+09:00

Pursuing my calling is both exciting and frustrating. My calling simultaneously feels like a significant way to help others and a massive, unsolvable problem. How about you? How do you feel about your calling?

As a Christian coach, you're free

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-03-13T08:34:52+09:00

Because God is at work in each of His people (Romans 8:28-29), you’re free. Because God is at work, you’re free not to give suggestions or advice to God’s people.

To encourage and empower others, listen

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-02-25T07:57:49+09:00

I like being listened to. When someone really listens to me, I feel heard, understood, and affirmed—and consequently, encouraged and empowered to pursue God’s calling. How about you? How do you feel when someone really listens to you?

To achieve your goals, get a coach

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-02-05T08:30:38+09:00

If you want to achieve your goals, get a coach. Your coach will listen, ask questions, and provide the support, encouragement, and accountability you need to achieve your goals.

4 questions to ask church planters

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-01-31T16:07:08+09:00

Church planters work hard and need support, encouragement, and accountability. They also need someone to provoke them to reflect.

You can help by asking church planters questions like...

What's a church?
What are the practical implications of Christians being a priesthood of believers?
Within a church, what's the role of the missionary? the laity?
What's success?

How can you encourage others?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-01-16T08:28:59+09:00

Everyone needs encouragement. You. Me. Everyone. How can you encourage others? Here’s a starter list.

Need to focus? Get coaching!

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2008-01-04T07:48:12+09:00

I like daily conversation. It flows freely, covers a range of topics, is not too focused, and is relaxing. How about you?

But when I want to achieve a goal, I need a focused conversation.

Provoke reflection

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-12-04T06:59:25+09:00

Want to empower others? Provoke them. Provoke them to reflect.

How does reflection empower? Here are responses from members of Connect2Empower, a professional development network for missionaries in Tokyo.

To turn a dream into reality, take action

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-11-01T08:15:24+09:00

What do you want to do? Things I want to do include living in a cottage in the Lake District.

Brainstorm your options, then commit to action

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-09-20T18:45:57+09:00

You have identified your goal. You’ve thought about what’s currently going on regarding the goal. Now you want to take action to achieve your goal. Good.

To clarify something, use "it's this, not this"

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-08-29T10:00:05+09:00

Want to clarify something? Make a list of what is is and what it's not. Here's an example what coaching is and is not.

Be aware! Beware! Then, take action

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-08-30T12:19:52+09:00

You have established a key goal, one that will make a difference at work and at home. You’re committed to your goal, and you want to take action.

Up for a challenge?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-08-14T14:42:44+09:00

You are? Good. Try going for 1 hour without asking or thinking a single question. That’s right, not one question. How do you think you’d do?

Add LIFE to the GROW process

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-07-09T08:56:32+09:00

You want to empower others. You want to empower others to focus on their goals, work smart, and pursue their callings. And you have decided to use the GROW process, a 4-step process that moves a person from goal to action.

Defining goals is pivotal

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-06-13T13:48:07+09:00

I believe 3 things about you and about me:

We want our lives to count for God, so we want to effectively use our limited resources.
We want to grow, and we grow as we take responsibility to define our goals.
When we define our goals, we clarify how we want to make our lives count for God and, consequently, how we can more effectively use our limited resources.

Ask questions to provoke reflection

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-05-22T11:58:06+09:00

Asking questions is an effective way to provoke reflection. Here are 10 questions you can ask:

Establish a coaching culture

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-04-24T12:52:08+09:00

What’s the goal of a coaching culture?
Empowering staff to close the rhetoric/reality gap by using coaching to lead, manage, influence, collaborate, and communicate.

What will you see in a coaching culture?
In addition to staff participating in formal coaching, you will see:

More listening, less talking
More inquiring, less advising
More focusing others on taking SMART actions, less letting others pursue undefined actions
More encouraging, less criticizing
More empowering others to solve their problems, less solving others’ problems

What benefits does a coaching culture provide for you?

More collaboration, less conflict
More results, less activity
More staff being supported, encouraged, and held accountable to achieve goals; less staff just being assigned goals
More focus on the mission, less focus on other good things
More smart work, less hard work
More pursuit of defined excellence, less pursuit of undefined excellence

What problems can a coaching culture help you address?

Low morale
Miscommunication
Fear of change
Underperformance
Staff attrition

What factors encourage a coaching culture to start growing?
Leaders and managers supporting a coaching culture by:

Getting formal coaching
Getting basic coach training
Coaching staff members
Using coaching throughout each day
Talking about how coaching has helped them and the organization

Staff:

Getting trained on how to benefit from coaching
Getting formal coaching

To begin establishing a coaching culture, take this self-assessment.

20 ways a coach can empower you

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2006-06-20T13:06:41+09:00

Do you believe in the mission God has called you to? If so, then I believe that you aspire to a great task and that you are willing to do the hard work it takes to accomplish that mission. A coach can help you.

Be a servant leader

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2006-08-10T12:15:34+09:00

How? By asking your colleagues good questions. For example, ask "In 1 sentence, what’s your goal?"

In coaching, who does what?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2006-11-16T12:10:05+09:00

Good question. Particularly since coaching is different from counseling and mentoring.

To achieve your goal, get a coach

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2006-12-08T11:43:01+09:00

You want to achieve your goal. But it’s just not happening. So many things are going on that you’re having trouble focusing on your goal. You think that if you could get some help, you could get to work on your goal.

Use coaching to empower others

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2006-12-14T11:31:16+09:00

You want to help a colleague achieve her goal. You need a process and a list of key skills. You need GROW LIFE.

As a Christian coach, what do you believe?

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-01-10T11:22:00+09:00

Coaches are not counselors or mentors. Consequently, coaches operate on different beliefs than counselors and mentors. What are my coaching beliefs? I have 4.

Use the GROW process to empower people

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-02-01T11:15:46+09:00

People you know want to grow. Your family members want to grow. Your work colleagues want to grow. Your fellow church members want to grow.

GROWLIFE coaching workshop a success

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-03-08T11:11:57+09:00

On March 2, 20 CAJ staff and missionaries attended Close the Gap’s GROWLIFE coach training. Participants learned about, experienced, and used the GROW process (Goal, Reality, Options, Will do) and LIFE skills (Listening, Inquiring, Focusing, Encouraging).

Lead by asking

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-03-19T11:05:37+09:00

Ask questions to help your colleagues focus, think through problems, and reach their goals. For example, if your colleague wants to increase student understanding and application of a biblical perspective, ask: How can questions help?

Use LIFE to empower people to grow

learnmore@closethegapnow.org — 2007-04-10T10:38:35+09:00

People want to grow. You want to grow. People you know want to grow. And you can empower them to grow by using LIFE. What’s LIFE? A set of 4 skills.